How Curiosity Unlocks Empathy

 

Photo by Johannes Plenio on Unsplash

Have you ever noticed how asking the right question can change the way you see someone? As an instructional designer, I’ve learned that curiosity isn’t just about learning, it’s about understanding.

“Is this learning content digestible for my learners?”
“Does this course meet its goal?”
“Is the concept taught by the SME relevant and clear?”

As an instructional designer, these questions run through my mind daily. This curiosity isn’t just about getting the job done it’s about truly understanding the topic, the learners, and the challenges they might face.

I vividly recall working on a computer network tutorial where the struggle to understand the content mirrored the struggle my learners might encounter. At one point, I felt stuck, but I asked myself: “If I can’t strive to understand this, how can I help others learn it?” That accountability pushed me to keep going.

Struggling to learn challenging topics taught me something deeper: learning can be painful. But that struggle also allows me to relate to others.

Curiosity bleeds into my everyday life: Whether I’m wondering about trees lining the road or imagining the stories behind someone’s experiences. The questions pop up automatically, as if curiosity is my default mode.

This natural curiosity, both at work and in life, captured in Peter Bregman’s insight in Harvard Business Review article “Empathy Starts with Curiosity.” He explains that asking questions (showing genuine interest in others) deepens our understanding and creates stronger connections. By approaching someone’s story with curiosity instead of assumptions, we open a space for trust, compassion, and shared humanity. Curiosity, he argues, is the key to empathy because it encourages us to explore perspectives that differ from our own.

In my role, I’ve learned that curiosity and empathy are inseparable. When I ask why learners struggle, I’m not just solving a problem, I’m stepping into their shoes. The same principle applies when listening to a friend’s challenges or observing someone’s journey. By asking questions, we uncover layers of their experience, making space for connection and care.

Curiosity doesn’t just help us learn new concepts, it helps us understand people. It’s in that pursuit of understanding of asking, listening, and reflecting — that empathy is unlocked.

So the next time someone shares a story, let your curiosity guide you. Ask questions, stay open, and truly listen — you might just unlock the kind of understanding that leads to empathy.